All grown up!

Each time we see our kids these days, it becomes more real that they are all grown up! Last weekend, when Sean and his wife, Natalie, visited us, I sat and listened as he spilled over with a passionate vision of ministry, a desire to make American Christians more aware of the world need and their responsibility for using what God has given them for God’s work. He’s a man, and that realization, was never more clear to me than last Sunday.

The youngest of our kids is 25, and they have all been out of our house for 5 years or more, so perhaps I'm just slow to recognize the obvious. When I say, ‘grown up,’ you realize that I am not just referring to the fact that they now live in adult-sized bodies. What I mean is that they are fully into their own lives, with their own circle of friends, financially independent of their parents, pursuing their dreams, with their own opinions and ideas about the world.

And here's the best part - I am thrilled for them! I do miss the days when they came home from school and filled the house with noise. Sometimes I get lonely and wish they were closer to home, and after they are here for a few days, I am equally thankful that they live at a distance from us!

I worry about some of their choices, too. What parent doesn't? But, they are all grown up just as we wanted them to be. We worked to get them to maturity, to help them become independent adults, because we knew that is how they would make their own contribution to the world and the kingdom of God. Jay, Sean, Chrissie, and Maribel will always be our kids, but they are no longer our dependent children - and that is as it should be.

When I say, “we worked to help them mature,” perhaps that strikes you as a strange statement. You may be thinking, “Doesn’t everyone grow up?” Yes, we all age and grow into adult bodies, but I know many people who are aged, but not mature!

In many cases it is because they have parents who ‘hover.' Some parens are so afraid to let their offspring experience disappointment or pain, so worried about their son or daughter making a 'wrong choice,' they stay inappropriately involved in their kids' lives. They keep on making decisions for their child, long after the time when that growing person should be choosing his own road. They provide too much support which perpetuates unhealthy dependence and stunts both emotional and spiritual growth. They remain in full parental roles long after their child should have become self-sufficient.

The person that emerges is often a child in an adult’s body, incapable of working through life’s challenges, living by whims, in debt, and wondering why life does not work for them.

I hope you are wise and know that keeping your child from all failure is not a gift! I hope you will allow them to appropriately taste the consequences of their actions, so they learn to choose wisely and grow into maturity.

This is not a message about raising kids, so let’s get to the point .

The Lord wants you and me, His beloved sons and daughter, to become mature men and women of faith, full of the Spirit!

Spiritual maturity does not ‘just happen’ with time. There are people who have known Christ as Savior for decades who are still acting like babies, who make no meaningful contribution to the work of the Kingdom of God, who are not really an asset to the church, who require immense amounts of constant care!

Then, there are those Believers who have grown deep in the things of God, who are steady in faith, whose lives are marked with ever-greater evidence of the life of the Spirit; the fruit of

“affection for others, exuberance about life, serenity, a willingness to stick with things, a sense of compassion in the heart, a conviction that a basic holiness permeates things and people, loyal commitments, not needing to force our way in life, and the ability to marshal and direct energies wisely" (Galatians 5:22-23, The Message)

Let’s explore several passages in the Word that refer to the importance of spiritual maturity and the results that such maturity produces in our lives.

Text - Ephesians 4:11-15 Pew Bible 1821

A. Maturity is taught by Spirit-filled leaders and produces discernment! READ

In 1954, William Golding published a novel that many of us were required to read in high school literature class - titled The Lord of the Flies. The book is the story of a group of boys whose plane is downed on a remote island. Without the supervision of adults, and because of their immaturity, they quickly revert to savagery and cruelty. It is a fascinating story of human depravity, packed with social symbolism.

God gave us wise and mature leaders who are charged, not to protect their place of power by perpetuating helplessness in those they lead, but by developing mature Believers capable of leading others!

Ephesians tells us that we should grow up in Christ so we are not subject to being misled by those who are only interested in their own power and privilege. Repeated the Word warns of church leaders who claim to be spiritual, but who are just out to take advantage of others.

Remember the sad saga of the Rev. Jim Jones and the People’s Temple? Lacking discernment, nearly a thousand people lined up to drink poisoned Kool-Aid as Jones ranted and raved in his madness. I’d like to say it is an isolated example, but it isn’t. Of course it is extreme, but there are literally hundreds of so-called spiritual communities around this country that are led by men or women who want to control others, use them for their own purposes.

With TV reaching into virtually every home, frauds and charlatans extend their reach! Discernment about the motives, intents, and truthfulness of doctrine has never been more important.

"We will no longer be infants, tossed back and forth by the waves, and blown here and there by every wind of teaching and by the cunning and craftiness of men in their deceitful scheming. Instead, speaking the truth in love, we will in all things grow up into him who is the Head, that is, Christ." (Ephesians 4:14-15, NIV)

Tragically, some Believers won't grow up. They remain totally dependent on spiritual leaders to tell what to do, how to live, where to go, how to serve. It isn’t always a controlling teacher or preacher that causes this. Sometimes it is Believers who refuse to accept the responsibility that come with maturity. God says, "grow up in Christ and learn to discern!"

Interestingly, that same passage in Ephesians says that maturity has a most desirable by-product: unity in the Body. People who are mature know how to get along, how to blend their gifts and abilities into the Church, for the benefit of all.

Our culture highly values independence and self-determination. And it is true that childish dependence needs to develop into independence as a person matures. But there is a step beyond independence of even greater maturity - the state of inter-dependence, that recognizes the great value of building strong relationships, of being integrated in a group of people that together are much stronger than anyone of them could be by himself.

Text - Hebrews 5:11- 6:2 Pew Bible 1867

B. Maturity is about going beyond the ‘sin and repent’ cycle into a life that honors God!

READ

Believers need to move into a Kingdom life. Some just come to Christ as Savior, and think that is it, the whole experience. They will not deal with their sinful nature, never do the work of applying spiritual principles to their lives which allow them to become holy adults. Instead, they fall into a 'sin, repent' cycle; for they are unwilling to really deal with the sinful habits that cripple them. These pitiful souls find little joy in their Christianity for they are always living fearfully, afraid that God doesn’t love them anymore. That is little kid stuff!

Toddlers need to be told again and again, “Daddy loves you.” They need to be reassured when they are being disciplined because they cannot appreciate that being sent to stand in the corner is not a personal rejection, but rather a way of expressing disapproval of their misbehavior! Eventually, that toddler grows up and learns that Mom and Dad can disapprove of their actions but still love them very, very much!

Some Believers feel the need to constantly question - “Does God love me? Why is He treating me this way if He really cares about me? Am I really bad?”

To that the Word says, “Grow up!” Stop trying to be converted, again and again. Stop thinking you need someone to lay hands on you, or someone to baptise you again. Learn the great truth of grace, that Christ died for sins, the marvelous and wonderful covenant of love that God’s amazing grace has provided, then get on with serving God maturely.

Mature Believers are not sinless, but they are increasingly spiritual when they learn from their failures, when they take steps to receive God’s provisions for holy living. Paul says, "we, ... reflect the Lord’s glory, (and we) are being transformed into his likeness with ever-increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit." (2 Corinthians 3:18, NIV)

Text - James 1: 2-4 Pew Bible 1880

C. Maturity develops under pressure and provides us with a whole spiritual experience!

Sometimes we can do things quite naturally, very easily. Others skills come with a lot of practice and hard work! If we want to be well-rounded people, we have to be willing to do what’s hard along with what is easy, don’t we? One evidence of maturity is finishing a job, bringing things to completion. Many projects are started, but when they become hard- the immature quit!

James observes that maturity brings 'completeness.'

READ

Let me read a part of that passage from The Message – "You know that under pressure, your faith-life is forced into the open and shows its true colors. So don’t try to get out of anything prematurely. Let it do its work so you become mature and well-developed, not deficient in any way." (James 1:3-4, The Message)

That is so practical, isn't it? There is no easy road to being an 'all grown up' Christian! We walk out our faith and step into places where we experience pressure, disappointment, and even confusion. But, there in that kind of stress, we also discover what real faith is. As we work with God, pray and persevere, a completeness of character and faith emerges. We are ready to serve Him in an effective and productive way.

On Thursday evening, the world was introduced to the Billy Graham Library, which was built in Charlotte, NC to recount the life of this spiritual giant who has influenced so many to turn to Christ as Savior. Three US Presidents gave tribute to the farm boy turned world renowned preacher. Graham, himself, at age 88, told the assembled crowd that the attention should be on the Lord, who led him all the way. What a testimony to maturity, to steady endurance, to pressing on despite pressure, criticism, and fatigue by taking hold of the hand of God.

I want to let God create that kind of maturity in me, a willingness to endure all things for the cause of Christ, and to end life saying, “now praise God for what’s He’s done and for what He has allowed me to be a part of.” How about you?

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As I close, let me direct!

Are you a mature Believer, or are you still a spiritual infant?

Part of that answer will be determined by when you came to Christ. If you become a Believer last week, we stand ready to encourage you, to help you, to care for you as you grow. Our desire here at Washington Assembly is stated in our motto which calls on each of us to be “Authentic, Accepting, and Accelerating- encouraging growth!”

We want you to become a mature Believer who knows the joy of serving God effectively and steadily.

If you came to faith a decade ago, you should be well on your way - growing in Christ - and making a Kingdom difference.

Follow the Scripture’s pattern -

A. Accept godly leadership that develops you as a Believer.

B. Go beyond the ‘sin focus’ to realize the deep truths of the faith and to live them out day by day.

C. Let hard times do the work of making you grow in Christ.

Here's a word from the Psalms about the quality of life that the spiritually mature enjoy. Let it speak to your life today.
" Blessed is the man (mature person)
Who walks not in the counsel of the ungodly,
Nor stands in the path of sinners,
Nor sits in the seat of the scornful;
But his delight is in the law of the Lord,
And in His law he meditates day and night.

He shall be like a tree
Planted by the rivers of water,
That brings forth its fruit in its season,
Whose leaf also shall not wither;
And whatever he does shall prosper." (Psalm 1:1-3, NKJV)

Amen